Friday, November 14, 2008

Will the Real Boss please stand?

Surprise! I have a follower! (and she has me too, for always) Surprise #2: I hardly ever know what will appear when I begin writing. It's Friday thank goodness, perhaps some sleeping in this weekend will re-charge my batteries cause they sure feel like they're running low. Is there such a thing as SUPER-charging, or is it a myth? There are many different types of dietary/supplementary/exercise programs that are touted to create miracles, I have even tried a select few of them. The most recent one that came across my radar recommends dietary fish oil, calcium/magnesium/zinc supplements, and moderate daily exercise for women who desire a better sex life. Applied together, they increase levels of feel-good hormones and testosterone. The results I experienced when I subscribed to most dietary programs were usually less-than-hoped for; and here's what I suspect. Regardless of whatever physical regimen I am subscribing to, what energizes my batteries more than anything is my own emotional climate. Wrapped around me like Red Riding Hood's cloak is an ever-changing emotional field that seems to stand at the helm, directing and upholding all other systems. I believe we are all subject to our own private monarchy the majority of the time, ie, the spiritual, emotional, mental, or physical 'body' is dominant. Here's an illustration: 6:00 am. My Emotional Queen is trying to sleep in. Spirit Child is off somewhere in a magically different dream world, and King Mental is jiggling his feet trying to put on his socks and get rolling. Physical Lady-In-Waiting politely knocks on the door. "Go Away!" says EQ. But, alas, there is no way that this urgent matter can wait, so EQ allows physical to summon Spirit Child from her meanderings, rises to handle the physical urgency, and confers with KM with regard to today's events. Make no mistake, however. Emotional Queen will always demand responsibility and accountability from Physical, Spiritual, and Mental, for she is aware of their synergic state. If any are indolent they will all pay a price. She may even at times hand over the reins for a brief respite, but inevitably resumes sovereignty.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Sunday Morning Meditations

Sophmore English; the diminutive Mr. P announced to a classroom full of students that we would from that point forward keep a journal. We received guidelines pertaining to formatting and frequency, and each Friday they were collected for inspection. At the time I remember being filled with resistance, even indignation! Up to that point, I had had several stops and starts with journaling and somehow, just never connected with the spiritual aspect. How dare anyone attempt to force me to make public the innermost, private workings of my heart and mind? And so, journal I did, with all the commitment of water to oil, effectively withholding from myself the ripeness of possibilities that may have ensued.
Yesterday my sweet mother-in-law, age 85, was enjoying a tour of Park City with several friends. As they were making their way to enjoy lunch together, she miss-stepped and was unable to save herself from landing on the back of her head. Indomitable spirit that she is, she attempted to pick herself up, even as she bled from her ears. It is astonishing to me that our physical bodies are created bearing the duality of such strength/fragility. She was transported to a nearby facility where she is receiving treatment for the injuries she sustained. As I stood by her bedside, I felt impressed to direct my thoughts to the miracle that is she. She has experienced over 31,000 days on earth as a young woman, sister, teacher, wife, mother, aunt, business woman, hostess, traveler, planner, creator, volunteer, and friend. As she lay prone and vulnerable, it seemed as if she were off on yet another holiday, leaving us to wonder when she would choose to return, knowing that she most certainly would. I have no doubt that many prayers have been offered in her behalf for her full recovery, and that the faith of the ones who love her have a direct and profound effect on her outcome. We are at her side and at her service. We are her devotees, and she is our beloved.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

"Ouch, Charley"

I hurt when I hurt. This is a characteristic of human nature that I recognized years ago upon observing the behavior of individuals as they struggled with terminal illness. At times they would attempt to blame others around them for their discomfort, or even the illness itself. The overused cliche' rears up to say "misery loves company!", and indeed, if we reach down deep enough to the source, grab it with both hands, dredge it up and throw it out, are we really that cognizant of the pain it causes others? Or are we desperately begging someone, anyone, to lift our burden if only for a moment? I found myself guilty of such behavior, and although I am not terminally ill, I discovered that uneasiness in any one of the pillars that hold us up can and do cause pain. Emotional and spiritual disconnect, financial setbacks, physical injuries or illnesses arrive at our door and stay like unwanted guests until we find the grace to master them, or they overtake us. So, I hurt and even though I remember the lessons my father taught me as he suffered the physical, emotional, spiritual, and financial strains of a terminal illness, I haven't the strength he had to accept it alone.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

A New Day Dawning

Just Moments Ago on my return trek from bus duty it dawned on me once more how God in His infinite wisdom will hold up a mirror for us to gaze into in order for us to remember Him and know ourselves, if we care to see. To the east, the mountain above Corner Canyon was sparkling with wakefulness at it's base beneath its fluffy cloud cap obliterating the tip. The skies above a pallette of cool greys, bright blues, warm crimsons, all vying for their chance to reflect their mood. The air swirling about my head, warm pockets here, chilly ones there, still indecisive about it's true intent. "Wake Up! You've been sleeping overlong through the simple, indolent days in the sun. Exciting, new energy is taking shape!" appears to be my message, and so I relay it here in the blue of the mountains and sky surrounding me and the wisdom flame within me.
I have received a gift upon awaking, and that is today. I have sixteen hours and thirty two minutes remaining of it at this very moment. What I choose to experience today is: joy, clarity, beauty, inspiration, safety, connection, and love. I will create these by remembering to laugh, caring for my physical body, clearly stating my feelings and intentions, raising the bar for myself, being mindful of others, and noticing the world changing moment to moment. Today in America we will cast our vote for our future experience. Here's to a new day.

Monday, November 3, 2008

make-n-take

A quilting open house once had for all the attendees a make-n-take project. Isn't it perfect how quilting is so often and in so many ways a metaphor for life: it's alot about what we make of it, and a bit about what we take from it.
This morning when I woke up the first thought I had (after the ones that say: "Hey, it's morning. You're still alive! It's another day, it's probably time to get up! How're you feeling? Everything still intact? Yep. O.K. Get up now. (and moments later; RIGHT NOW, you got urgent business to tend to)"...anyhow, the 'next first' thought was "you are a writer. I AM a writer! Gotta get up and write!" See, for a long time now other people believed it, told me I should, even said I was good, but I didn't believe it in my own mind. Or heart, or spirit. The beautiful thing about this morning was I finally believed it! It's about time, thank you. So, now comes the fun and hard part. DOING it.
Today, I choose to speak in a deep, rich red because it is the color of our root chakra that connects us to our circle of family and friends and to earth. Earlier today, I envisioned the next child waiting to be born into our family and that it would be Caraline's and Kyle's. Tonight around dinnertime she called to announce a mid-July arrival. It still amazes me at times how magically one person can be tuned in to another person, and I say this based solely on my own experiences as a mother. Those small niggling feelings usually nail it, and when we question how, the only answer is "I just knew". She is so stoked! Which may be what is contributing to her exhaustion.
So, Christy, how do I get one of those cool little baby counters like you have on your blog?
As I look about the room, I feel that connected feeling to everything I see. I have received it, touched it, cared for it, placed it where it is. I am part of it. I have stewardship over it, and it matters to me. When it no longer serves my higher good, I will release it to where or whomever I feel inspired. And then, in the constant flow of the river of life other things will appear in their stead to serve their divine purpose. I love RED. Today I bought red Gala apples, a red pomegranate, and a ruby red grapefruit which I consumed with great gusto for lunch. I love my red cowboy boots purchased in the red earth of Utah's Kanab. My favorite handbag is a red italian leather (saddle)bag my mom gifted me with. How else would my hubby pick me out of a crowded hockey stadium? Favorite book: Red Webster's dictionary. More lovely red things: Red - my next door neighbor for 20 years, raspberries plucked from the vines just last week, red grapes, my old tomato pincushion from 7th grade home-ec., the handle of my silver teakettle, red rooibus from Africa, my sofa. Eco-red t-shirt, furry red slippers and my old-lady car (in dog years she's 70 so I forgive her creaks and groans; I think she needs a hip replacement). Cherry pie, lipstick, lingerie, and lacy valentines. Pink, being a diluted shade of red is also high on my list of loves, with the rose colored glasses I prefer to view the world through rating right up there with pink peonies in the garden and pink roses in my teacup.


Sunday, November 2, 2008

November 2. It's Sunday evening, we gained an hour of sleep last night switching back from Mountain Daylight Time to Mountain Standard Time. I felt well rested this morning but a little groggy too. It has been a day for learning and stretching. In my heart and spirit it is a day for shaking things up even though in my head I do everything possible to avoid this sort of thing. Shake on Baby! It has been an entire month since I wrote anything here, and I am lamenting the things I wanted to say being lost. I left one home to return to my other one about six hours ago, and again, it was hard. It is hard missing my kids when I am on the mountain, and hard missing my husband when I am in the valley. We are doing the best we can with circumstances being what they are, but I feel that we are not growing together in ways I would like to. I do feel gratitude to be able to say that I am finding spaces betwixt the confusion and despair for hopes and dreams to form and foster renewed faith that all things happen for a reason and that there is divine order to life in it's many unveilings. Yesterday we were shopping for cookies for a Make-A-Wish Foundation fundraiser for one of the children's school club projects, and as fate would have it, there were not any of the sort of cookies to be had that we intended to find. Instead we wandered the acres of isles in the membership warehouse, searching every possible location (could they be in the bakery? with the snacks and crackers? perhaps someone inadvertently has tucked them into a cabinet next to the sofas! how about the cereal isle?) to no avail. Yesterday it was tiresome and frustrating, but tonight I realized the lesson for me was to search diligently for the things I hold dear and to leave no stone unturned.
October 31, Halloween! Last year on Halloween, a beautiful grandson was born to our family and I was invited to share the event along with his other set of grandparents. It was nothing short of a miracle to be present and witness his first breath of life and see him smile for the first time when less than 15 minutes old. I promise, it happened and has been happening regularly ever since. He is full of life and son-shine! The very same day, my husband suffered a significant heart attack and was treated at the very same hospital. Events occurred in such a way that the head of the cardiac unit happened to be close by en-route to speak at a funeral some distance away and was able to literally fly in, perform the required surgery on the blocked arteries within the recommended time frame to keep tissue damage minimal and save the day. And my husband. He has had a remarkable recovery, and whenever I feel his arms around me, or experience his wisdom, or his danish blue eyes, I feel gratitude for the marvels of technology and modern medicine, the skill of his doctor, the compassion of his nurses, and the grace of God for the "One More Day" that I keep getting to have. With him.

Frederiksborg

Frederiksborg
Castle, from a distance

Rome, Italy

Rome, Italy
Coliseum

Mariager, dock

Mariager, dock
nice boat...

Mariager, Denmark

Mariager, Denmark
Love those Boats!

At Ulla & Ole's beach house

At Ulla & Ole's beach house
God does make little green apples in the summertime

Tonder

Tonder
Thatched roof cottage/restaurant

Tonder, Denmark

Tonder, Denmark
Row House front

Tonder

Tonder
popular round windows

Tonder Tourist Gift Shop

Tonder Tourist Gift Shop
Roll out this Welcome Mat!

Rosenborg

Rosenborg
Red Boat in a Moat

Danish Doors

Danish Doors
Randers??

More Doorways

More Doorways
Tonder Door circa 1700's

Sophiacloster

Sophiacloster
Lavendar, daisies in the garden

Tante Thura's 96th Birthday

Tante Thura's 96th Birthday
Handpainted plate by Tante Thura

Home Away from Home

Home Away from Home
Assentoft; Sophiacloster

Tante Thura's 96th Birthday

Tante Thura's 96th Birthday
Mor Anna

Doorways to within

Doorways to within
Church door in Denmark

Rosenborg

Rosenborg
Castle Door

Rosenborg

Rosenborg
Rooftop view from a Castle

Highest Hillside in Copenhagen

Highest Hillside in Copenhagen
Mama Ewe strays away

Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday!
Kai, October 2007

Newleyweds!

Newleyweds!
Happy wedding day Sept. 2007

Ocean City

Ocean City
Sandcastle

Atlantic Ocean

Atlantic Ocean
Happy together summer 2007

Lavendar Crest Winery

Lavendar Crest Winery
complete with lavendar pigs

Lavendar Crest Winery

Lavendar Crest Winery
Road trip to Boston, 2007

Bridge across the Mississippi River

Bridge across the Mississippi River
Crossing in the Mayflower

Somewhere in Midwest

Somewhere in Midwest
NoWhere or NowHere?

Cousins

Cousins
Alden loves Kai

Sisters

Sisters
Chloe & Aleena at FarFar's